>> oh, the things these eyes have seen. >> yeah. now, stefon, the summer means lots of special events. what's a good venue for families looking to get together and celebrate? >> if you're looking to celebrate this summer, i know just the place for you. new york's hottest club is scampi. [ laughter ] illegally parked behind the statue of liberty. this hate speech haven is the creation of frat boy guru d-bag chopra. [ laughter ] this place has everything, zip drives, gozers, ke$ha. and guess who may drop by. is it ryan seacrest? no, it's a drowned albino who looks like axl rose. [ laughter ] but for the kids, there's a special workshop where they can build a bear but not the kind you think. [ laughter ] so come by this weekend and check out a vip section filled with fertile necks. >> do you mean turtlenecks? >> no, no, no, no.